Screen & Sound · The Lori Diaries
I was exhausted, stretched out on the sofa, and scrolling through my phone in search of something good to watch when Instagram put The Idea of You in front of me. Anne Hathaway, a handsome pop star, a romance that looked a little too good to be true. It seemed like exactly the sort of film I needed that evening. I pressed play expecting a lovely escape. Instead, somewhere between the flirting and the heartbreak, one line made me sit up and think: “People hate happy women.” It's a harsh thing to say. It's also the line that stayed with me long after the film ended.
A little warning: I'm talking about the whole film here, including the ending. 💗
I love a good romantic film.
I love the chance encounter, the conversation that lasts longer than either person expected, and that delicious moment when you can tell two people are interested in one another before they're ready to admit it.
The Idea of You gives me all of that.
It also gives me something I wasn't quite expecting: a woman who has spent years being sensible and responsible, suddenly confronted with the possibility of doing something just because it makes her happy.
And the film asks what happens when everyone around her decides that her happiness is theirs to discuss.
First, Let's Talk About Solène and Hayes
Anne Hathaway plays Solène, a 40-year-old divorced mother who owns an art gallery in Los Angeles. Nicholas Galitzine plays Hayes Campbell, a 24-year-old singer in August Moon, a boy band with the sort of following that makes privacy feel like a distant memory.
Their meeting is wonderfully ridiculous in the way a good romantic film is allowed to be.
Solène is meant to be enjoying a little time to herself. Instead, her ex-husband cancels his plans at the last minute, leaving her to take their teenage daughter, Izzy, and her friends to Coachella.
While looking for a bathroom, she accidentally finds herself in Hayes's private trailer.
Of course she does.
And of course the very famous, very attractive singer is immediately fascinated by the woman who has wandered into his space without treating him like the centre of the universe.
I know the setup requires me to suspend disbelief. But I was more than willing.
Hathaway and Galitzine have the kind of chemistry that makes a scene feel warmer just because they're standing close to each other. Their conversations are playful, a little awkward, and full of those pauses that make the flirting more interesting.
What I like most is that Hayes seems drawn to Solène as a person, rather than as someone's mother or as a woman who should be surprised that he's interested.
She has her own work, opinions, tastes, and life. He wants to know about them.
It's a small thing, perhaps, but it makes their romance much easier for me to believe in.
The Age Difference Isn't the Most Complicated Part
Solène is 40. Hayes is 24. There's a 16-year age gap between them.
The film doesn't pretend that this is irrelevant, and neither do I. They're at different stages of life, and Hayes's fame creates a world that Solène has never had to navigate.
But they're also two adults who are drawn to one another. That, in itself, isn't what makes their relationship difficult.
Solène has already lived through a marriage, a divorce, and years of putting her daughter's needs first. Hayes has grown up in the strange environment of a successful boy band, where thousands of people feel they know him without ever having met him.
I can understand why they find something comforting in each other.
He sees a woman who isn't interested in treating him like a celebrity. She meets someone who makes her feel desired and excited about what might happen next.
They're not looking for the same things they were looking for ten years earlier, and that's part of what makes the relationship interesting.
I also found myself thinking about how casually we're asked to accept a romance between an older man and a younger woman on screen.
Reverse the ages, and suddenly everybody seems to have a question.
Is she having a crisis? Is he serious? What does she think she's doing?
I don't think every age-gap relationship is automatically simple or healthy. The people involved still have to think about their circumstances, expectations, and whether they're treating one another well.
But I'd rather ask those questions about the relationship itself than decide a woman is making a mistake simply because she's the older one.
“People Hate Happy Women”
That's the sentence I haven't been able to stop thinking about.
Solène says she didn't realise her happiness would upset so many people, and her friend Tracy answers with those four words.
I don't take the line to mean that everybody literally dislikes seeing a woman happy.
What it captures, for me, is how quickly some people become uncomfortable when a woman's happiness doesn't follow the version of life they think she should want.
Solène is divorced. She's a mother. She's 40.
Apparently, those facts are enough for strangers to feel entitled to an opinion about whether she's allowed to fall in love with someone younger.
And it's not as though she's being reckless simply by enjoying his company. She knows her life comes with responsibilities. She thinks about her daughter. She worries about what the attention will mean for both of them.
What she hasn't done is ask the internet for permission.
That part made me think about how easily a relationship can become public entertainment once it appears on social media.
People can watch a few seconds of someone's life and feel certain they understand the entire story. A photograph becomes evidence. A comment becomes a theory. Before long, a real person has turned into a topic that strangers argue about while waiting for their coffee.
Hayes is used to that kind of attention, even if it affects him too. Solène isn't.
And the criticism aimed at her feels particularly personal. It isn't only about his fame or the difference in their ages. It becomes a judgement about what kind of woman she is.
What bothered me wasn't that people questioned the relationship. It was the way so many of them seemed to think Solène needed to justify wanting something for herself.
But Izzy Matters, Too
As much as I wanted Solène to be happy, I don't think the film would have worked for me if it ignored her daughter.
Izzy hasn't chosen a relationship with a famous singer. She hasn't agreed to have her family life discussed by strangers online. And she shouldn't have to pretend she's fine with all of that just because her mother is in love.
This is where the film becomes more complicated than a simple story about a woman refusing to care what other people think.
Solène isn't only protecting herself from cruel comments. She's watching the attention spill into her daughter's life.
I understand why that changes things for her.
It doesn't mean the strangers making those comments are right. It means their behaviour has consequences for people who never agreed to be part of the spectacle.
I wish Solène didn't have to choose between her relationship and her daughter's peace of mind, but I understand why she feels that she does.
And I appreciate that the film doesn't make Izzy the villain for having feelings about a situation that affects her.
A mother can deserve love and still have a responsibility to her child. Both things can be true.
The Part of the Romance I Found Most Tender
Beyond the glamorous trips and the excitement of dating a pop star, I liked the quieter moments between Solène and Hayes most.
They're the moments when he feels less like someone adored by a stadium and more like a young man trying to figure out who he is outside the band.
And Solène gets to be something other than the person who always has everything under control.
I don't need every romantic film to be realistic. I know this one is a fantasy.
But I do need to believe that the characters see something in each other beyond the obvious attraction.
Here, I did.
Hayes offers Solène a sense of possibility. Solène offers Hayes a connection that doesn't depend on the version of himself he performs for an audience.
Neither can completely escape the life they've built, but for a while, they get to imagine what it might be like to make room for someone else in it.
About That Ending
I knew this was a romance, but I still found myself hoping the film would give Solène an ending that felt like her own choice.
Eventually, she and Hayes separate because the pressure surrounding their relationship has become too much for Izzy.
I was sad to see it happen. I was also glad the film allowed Solène to make a difficult decision without pretending it was easy.
Then comes the five-year jump.
Hayes has continued with his music career, Izzy has grown up, and Solène is still at her gallery. When Hayes appears there again, the film leaves us with the possibility that they might be ready to begin something new.
We don't see them work through every obstacle. We don't get a detailed explanation of what their future will look like.
We get a reunion, a look, and a little hope.
For this particular film, I liked that.
The ending doesn't undo the hurt that came before it, but it allows Solène to imagine that her chance at happiness wasn't a one-time offer she missed.
And perhaps that's what I wanted most from the story.
Not a promise that love will always work out. Just the possibility that life can surprise you again, even when you thought that chapter had already closed.
I put on The Idea of You because I wanted something romantic to watch after a long day. It gave me the chemistry, beautiful moments, and emotional ending I was hoping for.
But it also left me thinking about how much easier it is to support the idea of a woman's happiness than to accept the choices she makes to find it.
Solène doesn't owe the world a perfectly sensible explanation for falling in love. At the same time, her responsibility to Izzy matters, and I liked that the film let those two truths exist together.
Anne Hathaway and Nicholas Galitzine made me care about this unlikely couple, and I was genuinely rooting for them by the end.
My rating: 4.5/5. I came for a lovely romance. I stayed for the reminder that a woman doesn't stop being allowed to want something for herself just because she's reached a certain age.
Have you watched The Idea of You? I'd love to know whether you were rooting for Solène and Hayes, and what you thought of that five-year ending.
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xoxo,
Lori
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